11 days!

That's right, I leave to see my brother in ind in 11 days! Their is enough i's their isn't there? I'm so excited I can hardly sit still! I am nervous, to. I haven't gotten any further in my head then getting on the bus. I haven't gotten to the first few moments with the sil and the kids. I don't know what it'll be like seeing the brother after 13 years. I don't think it'll be what you see on tv. Where they're hugging and crying and saying o I've missed you so!First of all, I'm not emotional by nature. and secondly, he's a guy! enough said. Sleep arrangements haven't been worked out yet, but, I don't care! I'll sleep on the back porch if they tell me to. Christmas at the loftis house is dec 12! I have presents for the kids. I wanna make cookies with them, but I don't want to clean it up, so I'll just play with them instead. The kids not the cookies. I'll be really carefull and kinda nervous for a bit, I'll not talk as much, and I'll apolgize for everything if I'm feeling especially insecure. I'm sure my depression will make itself known at least one day. When it does, I'll be especially quiet, and not want to be messed with. If I can manage it, I'll go hide somewhere and read or talk on the phone or sleep. Usually after that, I'm ok. I hope it snows while I'm their! O snow, I want to play in you! I'm excited to see the tree and watch the kids. O yes, and I get to turn into a 5 year old again! Barbbi, here comes a 5 year old in a 23 year olds body. Dec 9, hurry up! please! Oh, p.s. I always ripped my barbi's heads off, so this could be interesting. I think I'm old enough to restrain myself.

can I get some air?

Well, I hit the ground praying this morning. Access ride was early, so that was all fine and good. I got their at 9:20, meeting wasn't till 10. However, we were able to get started not long after I sat down. We went down stairs, and lord have mercy!it, was, so, hot! I was ready to strip and ask hey can we just do this with you looking at the wall? So, he started asking me questions, but then had to go deal with something. So I was alone for about 15 minutes. He came back, and continued the questions. I now have a resume, not much in it, but I do have one. We worked on some interviewing skills. One thing that I guess is important to the sighted comunity is smile when your speeking to an employer. Oh, boy! I have a really hard time smiling on cue! I can do the motion, but its not their. It just looks like I'm saying, hey, look, my teeth! I was done by 10:15. not bad, I just had to wait on acc ride which was suppose to come between 11 and 11:30. So I people watched. They came and we were on our way. So that's where the job hunt is. guess what this means? I can blog about other things! books, family, the cat, etc. it was hot in the van, to! so now, I'm home in my pjs with the window open. I'll enjoy a few more days in my house, before going to moms on saturday to spend the week. Don't worry, I shall write sometime. It keeps me sain!

a small step

So, that phone call that I was waiting for in the last post? came last thursday. I have a meeting tomorro with a job development agency at 10. I'm nervous, again! I went to ladies class this morning, came home and read scripture, and slept. I knew if I didn't, I would just be sitting here going, well, what's gonna happen? and, plus, it was rainy and yucky, so give the girl a break! Anyway, just wanted to pop in and update with what little news I have. Prayers are apreciated! I'll write tommoro when I'm home and know more

the meeting

Well, LET ME START OUT BY SAYING IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THE POST I put up on monday, you might want to do that, otherwise you'll be lost.So, I've been nerous about this meeting all week long. So when I woke up, I was a mess. To help pass the time, I started compiling a bucket list of things I want in life, some were goofy, some were not. I'm not done yet, but I'll post it when I am. Anyway, the time finally came for me to go down stairs and weight to be picked up. My pick up window started at 1:30 and ended at 2. So, I stood outside, and froze my behind off! So, about 5 till 2, they come. We had to pick up someone at the mall across the street. But the passenger wasn't where he was suppose to be, so that took like 15 minutes. I don't know what time we dropped him off, but I was getting a little nervous. So we drove, and drove, and drove. I texted and praid and worried. So we finally get to the building, and I'm just like, stressing to the max. I was 30 minutes late, and scared to death that the lady would yell at me. well, she didn't. to sum up the meeting, we talked, and I signed papers and then she said, ok thanks for coming in. are, you, kidding, me? 20 minutes or less, gese, she could have maile me the stuff. She said she was gonna get me connected with a job placement service called new, or knew, vision. The ride home was fine, just talked to the driver an this goofy guy behind me. I left at a bit after 4 and got home at 5:20. I'm glad that's done and over. now moving on to the next step. I guess I just wait for my phone to ring and then go from their.

another season in my life

Well, after giving it much thought, I have decided that medical transcription is not the way I want to spend my life. For one thing, I'm a horrible speller, and, I'm also a people person. I like being around and interacting with others, and with this job, I wouldn't have much of that. Working at home is not a good fit for me, either. I get distracted too easily, and wont finish what I started. I need to be in a work setting, where their is no distractions except those work related. I'm sure a lot of you are thinking, ok, you quit college because you didn't like it, you quit medical transcription, so, what are you good at? Well, that's a very good question, one that I'm trying to answer. I have a meeting with voac rehab on thursday afternoon, so maybe by the end of that, we will have come up with some sort of plan. I know this world has a place for me, I just need to find it.