a look back. 2011

wow, what a year of changes this has been. As a disclaimer I can't give you the exact date things changed, but I'll try.I think at the beginning of this year things were great. But sometime between january and june things started to change. One major thing that started to happen was I felt really unhappy in the church I was attending. Now, let me be clear, it was noones fault, noone did or said anything to make me feel this way, but either way, I was unhappy.
I started making excuses not to go to church on sundays. If you know me at all, you know I'm at church every single time the doors are open if at all possible. So at some point during that time, I said ok, I can't do this anymore. Nashville is not where I need to be. So after much discussing and worrying I decided to move back to where I was born and raised and where the majority of my family is. Gainesboro. Well actualy I wanted to be in the bigger city about 30 minutes away, cookeville, but knew finding housing on my restricted income would be very hard,, so i moved back in with mom at the end of may. hello, can you say change? yeah, big time. I'm so use to being by myself and now theirs this other person here. She works 10 hours a day so I'm still by myself a lot. Its not easy living with someone, 99 percent of the time we're ok, but their is that 1 percent when we're not. we're so alike its scary, but then we're so different. she's in bed by 9 or 10 and I'm up till 1 or 2 reading. She's up at 6 or 7 and I'm up at 10 or 11. I was afraid when I moved back that I wouldn't be able to find a church I liked, or the people wouldn't be nice. Well a really late night conversation changed that. A friend told me about faith chapel, and it really intrigued me. I asked what kind of church was it and was told non denominational. I was like, ok, I'll try it. Plus I had never heard of a singing preetchor and was like I should check this out. I couldn't get my head around the fact that a preetchor sings. I went sometime in june, and was hooked from the start. But, their was 1 small problem. transportation. the church is about 40 minutes away from my house. my uncle took me a couple times and mom took me and dropped me off once. I knew I couldn't keep asking family to take me because its like out in the midle of nowhere. But at the same time I realized that I belong their. you know when you walk in somewhere and you just know you belong? Yeah, it was that from the time I set foot in their. plus I'm a music junky, and the music their is amazing! As god always does, just when I had given up and thought I couldn't go their anymore, he provided me a way. A very talkative and amazing one, to. So that was right up my alley. We meet them at a store about 10 minutes from my house every sunday morning, and I ride with them. Not long after I started attending I felt different, I realized I didn't have to sit still and be quiet anymore. If I felt like jumping up and down and shouting then I could, and trust me i do. Some people ask why do you have to shout or dance or whatever? I do it because thats my way of praising god and feeling close to him. and let me assure you that if you get the feelings I get when i walk through that door you'll dance and shout to. I'm in the choire and love it. I also was rebaptized in july, this one wasn't planned or thought out, it was ok, i gotta do this right now no waiting. we do ours at a creek, let me tell you, that water's coooooooooold! I was placed on a waiting list for an apartment back in june. and as of this moment I'm still waiting. But its gods timing not mine. sometimes I get frustrated but I have to remember that it will happen. most likely when I'm not expecting it to. I can't express enough how blessed I am. I was surrounded by amazing people at antioch church of christ, and am surrounded by amazing people at faith chapel. the only goals I have for the coming year is to continue to grow close to god, he is my all and all. and of course get in that apartment in cookeville. So, on that note, I hope everyone has a blessed year, and I'm here if anyone needs to talk or vent or whatever. I'm sure your thinking well i don't want to bother you, its no bother, that's what a friend is for. text or facebook me any time.

update on apartment, life, and a book review.

nope, not yet. that's the update on the apartment. I'm still just waiting on god to give me one. Most of the time I'm ok with waiting, but yesterday I wanted an apartment and i wanted it now. well obviously I didn't get one. But I also didn't like the feeling I got so last night I praid for the coming day to be filled with patience, at least on that issue. And today has been, the apartment is never far from my mind, but at least I haven't been sitting here going ok, i wanna know now, right now! In other news, I got my computer back the week before thanksgiving I believe. We're rebonded and everything so life is good. church is going good, duh! its church! I'm still singing in the choire and jumping up and down like a nut, haha. I gave my testimony the night before thanksgiving, I thought it was horrible, but everybody I've talked to said o no you did great. well ok then, I still think it was bad, but to each his own. ok, now its time for a book review. If I reviewed every book I read, thats all this blog would talk about. this book is called The Cross And The Switchblade. OMW! Let me say this, I can only think of 1 other book that I have read start to finish in 24 hours, and that was a child called it. This book is about a preacher who listened to the calling of the lord and went to new york in the 50s to try to reach out to 7 boys on trial for murder. what results in his efffert is a nation wide program called teen challenge. read it! and yes their is a sequel, its called beyond The Cross And The Switchblade. it was published in the 70s. o in case y'll didn't know christmas is coming, just thought i'd throw that in. My shopping is done and most of my gifts have already been given to the people so I'm like ok, i'm done. I hope everyone has a blessed holliday season in case i don't get back in here to write, remember its not about gifts, its about jesus. if I get an apartment after I finish celebrating I'll be sure to drop by and update the few readers I have.